Megolomanaical CEO – check.

Booming competition – check.

Lower sales – check.

Price war vs cheap Chinese producers – check.

Slowing production – check.

Mass layoffs – check.

Among the worst performing stocks in the S&P500 year-to-date – check.

Social media problems (ie: CEO is unofficial CEO of it and spends all his time onnit) – that’s a big check…


Yes, Tesla (TSLA) has gone and had a shit few months.

For the last week, as the share price fell even further, tortured shareholders have done their best to prepare for what only the limit of human imagination could become the electric carmaker’s worst results.

In anticipation,  TSLA stock has screeched to a -42% halt, so far this year.

And, while the carmaker didn’t exactly meet analyst expectations, the company’s first-quarter results were positively received by shareholders.

As one can note in after hours trade…

Via Google


So what happened?

Well, regardless of the sales slump which led to a 9% fall over in first-quarter revenu, your man, Elon has promised to fast-track the launch of “more affordable” EVs.

The TSLA biz letter dropped ahead of the earnings call pledged to “accelerate the launch of new models ahead of our previously communicated start of production in the second half of 2025”.

These’ll be of the “more affordable” sort, which can be pumped out via already waiting manufacturing lines inside various gigafactories.

While great news, and a short-term booster for a shattered share price, the reality as best described by the Deutsche Bank analyst Emmanuel Rosner is closer to what we’ve been seeing.

“TSLA stock will need to undergo a potentially painful transition in ownership base, with investors previously focused on Tesla’s EV volume and cost advantage potentially throwing in the towel.”

Elon decared back in January that Tesla was prepping production of a new cheaper EV next year, priced at US$25,000 and dubbed Model 2.

TSLA stock had fallen on a Reuters report earlier this month that the project had been shelved, which Musk strenuously denied.

During the TSLA earnings call (below) Musk noted that no matter what, Tesla will break the back of auto-autonomy.

“Even if aliens kidnap me tomorrow, Tesla will solve autonomy.”

Chaos in perpetuity

The earnings report follows another cray-cray week in the life of Tesla, which slashed prices in many of its major markets, following notable price cuts in the States.

Its wunderkind-billionaire boss Elon Musk picked a blue with our own Albo, and then had to nix a long-overdue trip to India, where surely Tesla is ripe to make some inroads.

PM Anthony called Elon a right “arrogant billionaire who thinks he is above the law” which was right twice although this was in regards to the refusal of the X-boss to scuttle videos of the violent stabbing in a Sydney church last week.

The federal court ordered a 2-day injunction against X to hide posts globally containing the footage of the alleged stabbing.

The eSafety commissioner had also told X to remove the posts, but Elon’s people at X had only blocked them from access in Australia – pending Elon’s own legal challenge.

And some hearty X-ing:

Albo on Tuesday called Elon “a bloke who’s chosen ego and showing violence over common sense”.

Meanwhile, Elon also left Narendra Modi hanging. Originally Musky had planned to announce with some Elon-dazzle, TSLA’s bustling entry into the market with a $2bn-$3bn hunk of investing.

But with the results call incoming and the company 0 – and particularly the CEO – under mounting pressure, Mr Musk delayed the Dehli trip citing “very heavy Tesla obligations.”

TSLA Q1 Earnings

What Wall Street expected:
Q1 revenue of $22.5bn and EPS of $0.50.

What Wall Street got:
Q1 revenue of $21.3bn, and EPS of $0.34.