A wrap of last week’s major investing news, told by the internet’s highest quality* memes.

On Monday the ASX’s brand new system crapped the bed just 24 minutes into trading, which was subsequently halted for the day while the technical team worked on a fix.

It was unfortunate timing. The bourse was surging at the time, up 79.1 points — or 1.23 per cent.

Everyone right now from r/ASX_Bets


“This is the longest I’ve gone without making a loss,” says big trash talker, small stock picker ‘u/1stPostISwear’.

Chucking a sickie? from r/ASX_Bets

I can’t believe you’ve done this from r/ASX_Bets

US biotech Moderna announced a vaccine which was ~94.5 per cent effective, just seven days after Pfizer revealed a successful vaccine trial of its own.

The same, except Moderna’s headline result was better.


Out of the way, you from r/ASX_Bets

This news, plus better-than-expected industrial data from China, saw Wall Street rally to record highs and European share markets hit their highest levels in more than eight months on Monday.

But would the ASX – which confirmed that it would open at 10am Tuesday as scheduled – actually work?

Yep. By 11:30am, the Aussie market had hit eight-month highs, with energy and travel stocks the clear standout.

Alright guys, back in the pile! from r/ASX_Bets

Tesla’s planned inclusion in the S&P 500 — an index that follows the 500 biggest companies on Wall Street – saw shares rally hard.

Yet some of the market’s biggest players haven’t yet piled in. Large-cap mutual funds tracking the S&P 500 can fuel massive demand for the shares once Tesla officially joins the index in December.

Stonks this week from r/wallstreetbets

And an ASIC report noted that Gen Y was taking out loans to pay their buy now, pay later loans. Markets could not care less.

Looming BNPL Crackdown from r/ASX_Bets


*In our humble opinion