LAST ORDERS: One man’s titanic struggle to make sense of even the simplest things today.

OMG, Tuesdays, amirite?

There’s been a lot of info flying around the newsroom today, and a fair bit happening in other places as well, so here’s a flying recap of all the bits that we reckon might have flown under your radar and hit you fair in the knees while you were busy looking somewhere else.

FROM THE HEADLINES

From Los Angeles or wherever television comes from these days, there’s terrible news that Funny Man Jay Leno has suffered serious burns to his face, after one of his millions of cars blew up, causing a “flash fire”.

Leno has released a statement, saying: “I got some serious burns from a gasoline fire. I am OK. Just need a week or two to get back on my feet.”

Firefighters have reported that the fire has so far consumed about 8 acres of Leno’s chin, but with crews en route from as far away as Canada, they are confident they will have it under control well before Christmas.

And from the Netherlands comes an announcement that plant-based ‘meat’ is now cheaper to buy than regular, walking-around meat,according to research by anti-meat group ProVeg International.

The research initially found that, in February of this year, normal old I-used-to-have-a-face meat was cheaper, but rising farming costs and other inflationary pressures now means that I-was-born-in-a-petri-dish slabs of muscle-esque-bonded-protein-goop is – surprisingly cheaper in supermarkets.

Cows, meanwhile, have begun worldwide industrial action, claiming that an increased consumption of plant material by humans will leave less for the cows to eat, and if beef consumption falls as a result of these pricing trends, many of them will end up unemployed and completely reliant on government handouts.

WHAT YOU MIGHT HAVE MISSED

Arafura Rare Earths (ASX:ARU) has announced that it’s been given a Northern Territory government nod for its Nolans Neodymium-Praseodymium project, after Nicole Manison, Deputy Chief Minister and Minister for Mining and Industry, advised that the Application for an Authorisation of the Nolans Rare Earth Project under section 36 of the Mining Management Act 2001 has been approved and Authorisation 1127-01 granted.

The Arafura team has spent about two-and-a-half years on the Mining Management Plan and the Environmental Management Plan, and their acceptance by the NT Govt completes the final stage of NT environmental approval process, leaving the sign-off of a small number of the EMPs under the Federal EPBC Act and an NT water extraction licence to go.

Meanwhile, Hannans (ASX:HNR) is whistling all the way to the bank today, after its $2.0 million Cap Raise closed waaay oversubscribed, with 554 applicants putting their hands up to kick the tin for $3.4 million of new shares.

Additionally, “a review of proxy votes received for the meeting of shareholders to consider the change in scale and nature of activities to the recycling of lithium-ion batteries in Europe, indicate approximately 99% of votes to be cast4 are in favour of the applicable resolutions”, Hannans says.

TRADING HALTS

Caravel Minerals (ASX:CVV) – Capital Raise.

Element 25 (ASX:E25) – Capital Raise.

Bionomics (ASX:BNO) – BNO has an announcement on the way about the announcement outcome of its proposed US public offering of new American Depository Shares (ADSs), each representing 180 ordinary shares of Bionomics.

Global Oil & Gas (ASX:GLV) – Capital Raise.