Local markets have dipped again this morning, after a mixed result from Wall Street overnight paved the way for another bout of early morning mediocre feelings.

It’s not all bad news, though – a tech surge in the US has been echoed locally, and loudly, but I’ll dig into that data shortly.

But first, I have no choice but to bring you some very serious news, which is of such global significance that I strongly recommend that you make sure you’re seated somewhere comfortable, and you’ve alerted co-workers, family members and friends that there’s a very strong possibility of you having a medical emergency.

Ladies and gentlemen… The World Record for a Cat Jumping a Skipping Rope has been broken.

I know, I know… it’s a lot to take in, and it’s completely natural for you to feel shock, disbelief and outrage.

The cat, 13-year-old Kit Kat from Missouri, has stunned the sporting world by jumping the rope 9 times … nine!!! … in 60 seconds.

I didn’t believe the news at first, either – but when I saw the following footage (and had it checked by multiple experts to ensure that it hasn’t been doctored in any way), I had to accept that it’s true.

Although now, upon re-watching that, I’m not 100% sure that Kit Kat was jumping for the record. I suspect the animal might have been engaged in a fairly determined (but sadly unsuccessful) attempt to get owner/trainer Trisha Seifried to STFU.

Seifried claims that Kit Kat was born to be a record-breaker.

“By six months old Kit Kat was jumping rope in front of huge crowds of people at the farm, helping to bust myths that cats can’t be trained,” Seifried told local media, shedding light on two very salient facts.

  1. Life must be pretty damn slow in Missouri, and
  2. Seifried probably cannot count.

 

TO MARKETS

Aussie markets were supposed to open higher this morning, but didn’t – at 8am AEST, the ASX 200 index futures was pointing up by around +0.2%, but by the time the bell rang to start the game this morning, things were running at the inverse of that prediction.

However, by lunchtime the broader ASX has staged something of a recovery to be up 0.08% – and investors have an enormous surge from the InfoTech sector to thank for that.

While most of the local market has been floating along doing not much at all, InfoTech has packed on +5.84% this morning, putting it so far out in front of the rest of the market that investors can barely hear it beeping.

Among those leading the tech charge was electronic design software company Altium (ASX:ALU), which dropped its earnings report after-hours yesterday and is enjoying a 27.5% bump today, pushing its market cap well beyond $6.1 billion.

Likewise, Megaport (ASX:MP1) is soaring this morning, up 21.75% after it released its results an hour before the bell rang today.

Holding things back this morning are a few of the big names on the ASX, including Coles Group (ASX:COL). The supermarket giant has dropped 6.0% this morning despite revealing that the company’s profits are up 4.8% to $1.09 billion.

And mining giant BHP (ASX:BHP) has dropped more than 1.5% this morning, on news that we all kinda knew was coming, but which turned out to be heaps worse than we thought.

The Big Australian reported that its full-year underlying profit is down 37%, because of falling commodity prices – but the company will managed to rake in US$13.4 billion ($20.8 billion), so it’s not quite the disaster it looks like at first glance.

 

NOT THE ASX

It was a mixed session on Wall Street last night, after a surge among tech stocks – led by a +8.5% jump to US$470 for Nvidia – delivered a 1.56% rise for the tech-heavy Nasdaq.

The S&P 500 rose by 0.69%, but that stuffy old Dow index refused to come to the party, choosing instead to sit morosely in the study and harrumph in its lounge chair, falling 0.11% in the process.

Nividia’s upward trajectory came after more analysts raised their forecasts on the stock, with the average price target now above US$520, up from US$505 just a week ago, Earlybird Eddy reported this morning.

According to data from Bloomberg, almost 90% of analysts recommend buying the stock.

Zoom Video rallied more than 3% on a bullish forecast, and in what’s set to be this year’s biggest IPO, Softbank’s chipmaker Arm has filed for a Nasdaq listing.

Softbank acquired Arm in 2016 for US$32 billion, and the listing is expected to give Arm a market cap of around US$60 billion.

Meanwhile, the rout in the bonds market continues as 10-year US Treasury yields hit a 16-year high.

The US is still two days out from the bankers meeting at Jackson Hole, scheduled to kick off on 24 August – and that’s going to offer up the clearest view yet of how the US Fed is seeing the future of the American economy.

In Japan, the Nikkei is up 0.65% as the nation responds to desperate pleas from authorities for music festival attendees to act in a “more decent manner”.

The call went out after the injury toll from the moshpit at the annual five-day Rock in Japan Festival rose to… four.

Organisers confirmed that four people were hospitalised after people in the crowd formed what’s known as a “circle pit” which involves a large group of people acting like meatheads while running around in a circle.

For those not in the know, here’s one that the uniquely Japanese band Babymetal got started during their recent Australian tour.

But with four people reporting injuries, Japanese officials have put the call out for national calm, as the Rock in Japan festival is expanding to be 10 days long in 2024, and it’s unlikely that the Japanese health care system could cope if the number of circle pit injuries rose past six.

In China, literally everything is still horrible. But Shanghai markets are treading water at +0.02%, while in Hong Kong the Hang Seng has ticked up 0.2% in early trade.

 

ASX SMALL CAP WINNERS

Here are the best performing ASX small cap stocks for 22 August [intraday]:

Swipe or scroll to reveal full table. Click headings to sort:

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Top of the Small Caps ladder this morning is Red Metal (ASX:RDM), up 35.3% this morning on yesterday’s news that the company has assay results from the proof-of-concept drilling of a rare earth oxide (REO) enriched granite intrusion on the Sybella project, near Mt Isa in Northwest Queensland.

The company says the results – which include intercepts such as 114m @ 1,723ppm TREO+Y with 336ppm NdPr Oxide from 6m to EOH – suggest that the granite intrusion has scope to host a vast tonnage of near surface REO mineralisation that should be recoverable by the application of a weak acid solution.

Artemis Resources (ASX:ARV) has risen more than 18% this morning for absolutely no reason, while Redbubble (ASX:RBL) – which operates global online marketplace connecting independent artists with customers – has put on more than 15.5% after announcing a Gross Profit After Paid Acquisition (GPAPA) margin of 28.5%, 550 basis points above the prior corresponding period (pcp) and 350 basis points above the historical average.

And there’s been a turnaround of fortunes for Orexplore Technologies (ASX:OXT), which sagged 14% this morning as short-term investors engaged in a spot of profit taking, but returned to greener pastures in short order to be at +7% for the day so far.

 

ASX SMALL CAP LOSERS

Here are the most-worst performing ASX small cap stocks for 22 August [intraday]:

Swipe or scroll to reveal full table. Click headings to sort:

Wordpress Table Plugin

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