Move over Michael Jordan – there’s a new playa in town, one who’s managed to become the freshest record holder in the sporting world of… *checks notes*… rodent basketball slam dunks.

Which is a very real thing, recognised at least by the silly people at Guinness World Records, because… well, quite a few people have too much spare time on their hands. Yeah… let’s go with that.

Anyway – playing out of Dombóvár, Hungary, Molly the guinea pig has become a world record holder, thumping home four (count ‘em… four!!!) tiny basketball dunks in 30 seconds.

Amazing animal. Magnificent athlete. A credit to her species, and to the sport.

An interesting side note to this gripping yarn: Molly actually set this record late last year, but the announcement appears to have been delayed for some reason.

Our guess? It seems pretty god damn clear Molly failed her initial mandatory drug-test, before lawyers representing Guinea Pigs in Sport and Science (GPISAS) took time out from the ongoing ‘We don’t want to be your Guinea Pigs anymore,’ legal battle quashed the announcement demanding a new test, effectively stalling the World Anti-Doping Agency for a few months until the suits got Molly off the sweet performance enhancing sweetness of the human pituitary gland and taught her how to perch on the bottle to get a really clean urine sample.

To Markets!

It’s been a strong comeback for the ASX 200 today, getting stuck into Friday with a winter in its step. The IT sector has gone all Apple on us (+2.67%) and the major miners leading the Materials sector strongly as well (+2.48%). The benchmark index is in the green by ~0.75%.

The talk of the town, however, is still lithium –  Firefinch (ASX:FFX) is it the – ahem – backend of the coalface, since the FFX “the front fell off”.

As we broke for lunch, Firefinch is some 60% lower, as the full impact of its demerger becomes apparent.

The company was no doubt steeling itself for a drop of some kind, as the market’s all-consuming love affair with lithium was always going to make Leo Lithium the new darling in the schoolyard – and the drop, while obviously not welcome, still leaves Firefinch at a not-insurmountable -4.0% YTD.

Elsewhere, and I say this with a straight face – the air is well and truly out of the tyres at Bikeexchange (ASX:BEX) – which has slumped another ~26% and is now rolling on down that hill at a clip of 90% YTD.

The top end of town – well it’s a Materials improvement for them that’s dig-digging holes. Champion Iron (ASX:CIA), Core Lithium (ASX:CIO), Lake Resources (ASX:LKE) and Ioneer (ASX:INR) are all up between ~7.2% to ~13.2% respectively.

The health majors are lower during a tough week for medtech names.  Healius (ASX:HLS) shedding value off the back of an underwhelming trading update, while Australian Clinical Labs (ASX:ACL) continues to find its feet in a post-COVID testing world as demand starts to dry up.

Around the grounds, Wall Street finished higher, with the Dow (+1/33%), S&P (+1.84%) and the Nasdaq (+2.69%) all making happy faces.

Asian markets are in pursuit. At Sydney lunchtime, the Nikkei is up (+1.09%), Hong Kong down (1.00%) and a battered Shanghai is inching forward (0.42%) in more than a merely fiscal sense.

Oil prices dribbled down further (-0.14%), gold prices crept up (+0.10%) and the Aussie Dollar is sitting very still, no doubt hoping if it doesn’t move, then no one can see it.

ASX SMALL CAP WINNERS

Here are the best performing ASX small cap stocks for June 3 [intraday]:

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Stacking on the kilos this morning was CardieX (ASX:CDX), which has shot up on the back of a hugely positive independent evaluation by MST Access reaffirmed its value at $1.50, 5 times higher than where it was when the MST took a look at it. That news helped the cardiovascular medtech jump ~40%.

Also heading higher is Carnegie Clean Energy (ASX:CCE), on news its collab’ with Hewlett Packard is bearing fruit, and Living Cell Technologies after it recently raised more than $1 million to keep it in the hunt for a fix for Parkinson’s Disease.

ASX SMALL CAP LOSERS

Here are the worst performing ASX small cap stocks for June 3 [intraday]:

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